I'm finding it hard to interact with 'new' people online. I thought I'd make some more friends in 2010 and make the effort to go out there and message people on social networking sites etc. As as rule (for fear of rejection mostly If I'm honest.) I don't normally go looking for new people, I let them find me, that way I can be sure they want to actually get to know me if they send a msg/add request or whatever. But I guess I can't moan about being lonely if I make no effort to find people myself can I? so attempt to find people I did. I made profiles on a few sites, pretty much the same on every one and used search facilities to see who was about. I sent messages to people I had things in common with or thought generally looked cool. What could go wrong? well, everything actually. ha.
Rejection is rife online. I don't think many people saw past my profile thumbnail before declining my add request or simply hitting 'delete' on my message. I feel cheated. I have so much to give but no-one wants to take it with them. Anyone over 21 is considered a 'pensioner' in gay years and the 'type' of guy I've always gone for in a relationship in the past has always been younger than me. But I'm getting old, people in their twenties no-longer wanna talk to rusty old farts like me online. But that's relationships, surely chat friends can be of any age? I have some of the most fabulous chat friends of all ages and I have such a laugh with them at times, I even tend to forget there is even an age gap at times. Thankfully not everyone rejected my attempts to make friends and a couple people at least replied with the standard "I'm ok thanks, how are you?" before then hitting 'delete' and never bothering to make contact again.
Oh how I love being online. *shrugs*
It's not all doom and gloom though. I'm keeping busy elsewhere. I thought it would be a while before we got the next Issue of T. Pig Magazine together but thanks to some fabulous people helping out. (You know who you are.) we now have the January Issue ready to burst into the public eye. (soon, anyway.) I'm hoping when the postman comes he'll have lots of stuff for me too. I'm waiting on some things I've ordered on eBay to arrive and I'm hoping there will be a reply to my complaint to the medical team at the Cedars Centre about having to change Doctors again. January 27th will soon be here and I really hope they sort things out before then (my next scheduled appointment) and I don't have to see anyone new. I've told them if I can't go back to Doctor Mann then I'd rather not see anybody. Do you think I've done the right thing? I don't want them coming to cart me away. Appointments with Joan will resume as normal, but I am rather anxious about who will be helping her.
I don't know how you find the energy to interact and talk to all the people you do! I'm sure I'm very anti-social, but I can only manage keeping regular contact with a handful of people - not cos I don't like the rest, but because I just can't manage anymore and get anything else done as well! lol
ReplyDeleteI think Doc Mann was good with you. Stick to your guns! But if it's a total no-no, I wouldn't just refuse any further help - but do press for Doc Mann!
You are SO not old! If you are, I am, so you are not! There, that's decided then! :D
I'm gonna keep everything crossed for Doctor Mann, but I won't hold my breath. It's never gone my way before with that place so I'm not expecting miracles. He was probably the coolest Doctor I've ever spoken to though. He made me feel like he actually cared, rather than just talk down to me like the others sometimes did.
ReplyDeleteI thought some new chatfriends might liven things up a bit for the new year, but all I've achieved is to make myself even more miserable coz of the many rejections it's caused. ha.